Few months ago, I reported an incident involving me and Dr E. He accused me of mismanaging a patient. I still maintain my innocence. I have since spoken to several other senior colleagues. And every single one of them was appalled by the way Dr E treated me. They all agreed that it wasn't my fault.
I should feel vindicated. I should feel relieved and consoled.
But I am not!!
One good thing about all the medical consultants in my hospital is that they are all very friendly and approachable. Until this incident, that is. Ever since the incident, whenever I see Dr E and wish him a good morning/afternoon, he will just walk pass without acknowledging my greeting. I am being ignored!
I can live with it. But I can't stand being belittled by him. Two days ago I made a diagnostic mistake. I'm not trying to justify my mistake, but these two conditions do mimic each other, and it is often very difficult to differentiate them confidently. Anyway, Dr E wasn't impressed with my misdiagnosis. He sneered at me, and said, "It's obvious isn't it that this is condition X, and not condition Y?"
I felt humiliated. Worse still I feel dejected and demoralised.
It may sound overemotional (and maybe a bit sissy-like too). But how am I supposed to stay loyal to such a boss? How am I supposed to give him my 120% when I don't feel appreciated?
Perhaps I'm right afterall to call myself a hospital slave.
My best buddy right now
About Me
- Hospital Slave
- Norwich, Norfolk, United Kingdom
2 comments:
That is really very tragic. A good teacher instills knowledge, confidence and imparts his wisdom and does so w/ motivation and not with humiliation. People who act this way, as I'm sure you know, have their own personal issues that drive this kind of hurtful behavior, mainly b/c they have so many internal hurts and don't know how to heal them except by hurting others. You are there to learn and apply your knowledge from school right? You can't expect to know everything w/out having what only life experience can give you and then you will still make mistakes. I've been misdx'd
by drs who have practiced for years b/c of simliar sx's. I once had a very common ailment and saw five drs before it was diagnosed. He should have shown you how to detect the subtle differences in the conditions and made this a powerful learning experience instead of belitting you for his own mental achievement. He's being a butthead. He must feel threatened by you also or he wouldn't put you down and ignore you. When I've worked w/ people like that I pray or meditate for them, despite how hard it is to do, for them to have love and healing in their heart. Sometimes it helps, and it helps me feel like I'm taking the higher road and wishing for their highest good. i wish you the best w/ this very difficult situation.
Thanks for the comforting words. But still I have to deal with him day in day out. Many a times I felt like going up to him and confront him directly. But then what would I gain from doing that? A bad name only, I suspect. One thing for sure is that I won't be asking him for a reference. Haha!!
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